Back to Oakville

I saw mum today and she looks good , despite the recent bad luck . She is resigned to the situation though and is obviously concerned about Doug's health more than anything. Hopefully they will still be able to take another trip in the near future .

Deep breath now ....time to take a break and regroup.

On the way home

Airports have negative associations for me. They remind me of tearful departures , uncomfortable reunions, lost luggage and an uneasy sense of vulnerability and chaos.

For years , mum lived in the UK and Andrew and I lived in South Africa and subsequently in Canada. For us, the happy pick-up at the airport was almost immediately replaced with a sense of anticipation of the return journey ....the countdown starts before we leave the underground parking . The last time I saw my father just before he died was as he was leaving for a trip and the last conversation with him was over a crackly phone line to Mauritius.When I say goodbye to people I have this irrational fear ....what if I don't see them again ?

On the surface I appear to be fairly global , I can literally get ready in five minutes, sling my passport into my bag and off I go .However, I have increasingly found that as I age, I resist the distance between myself and people I love .Although I hide it very well from Colin, I already fear the day when he informs me that he is off around the world on an adventure ! It's as though I have this primal urge to gather everyone around me in the homestead and keep them close ...even though I am well aware that I don't possess magic powers of protection and sometimes the very thing you dread the most will actually happen. That is unfortunately part of the human condition .The logical part of my brain realizes that we have no choice but to tolerate randomness and uncertainty .

Mum and Doug left Buffalo with a certain degree of unease. I was concerned about how they would manage the logistics of travel and obviously I had some very real concerns about their health. In particular, my mother seemed less resilient and more fragile . Despite the fact she has done extremely well with her treatment and she is relatively healthy, her recent bout of bronchitis and frequent nausea meant that she had to pace herself and watch her energy levels.

Unfortunately , they are unable to complete their trip or even take the cruise back to Florida. The doctor in England has advised Doug to fly home immediately and they are returning today by plane. It's for the best , there's no point taking unnecessary risks .

Mum is pragmatic. it's quite obvious to her that the trip wasn't meant to be and there is no point agonizing about the fact that it's over . She will be home in a few hours and if I am being really selfish (and honest) there's a part of me that is relieved.I can stop worrying now . Doug will have the medical treatment he needs and my mother is safe .

Trip From Hell

This is from Doug ..... I just don't know what to say . I only found out YESTERDAY that they did not get on the cruise ship . They decided to just manage themselves ....how I wish they had called me .... but I wonder if it would have still turned out the same ??? You can help missed flights and delays ....I feel terrible for them both.


We are now in Swanage staying at `Celia's bother Charlie's apartment. He left For Scotland this morning to visit his son and his family.

Monday night I completed a 3 page diary to give you the details of our trip from Hell so far but when I tried to connect with the server at our Quality Hotel - Heathrow, they ended up changing my laptop settings and I never did get it sent, If I can get Celia to retype it, we'll send it later.

In essence, here is what happened:
Friday we boarded the plane on time to fly to NYC to get the Queen Mary 2. Because of a severe storm on the East coast all air traffic was backed up to the point that out flight was delayed from takeoff so that it was impossible for us to get the embarkation time of 5:00 PM. We recovered our luggage after two hours and just grabbed a local hotel for the night.

Saturday we decided we were not admitting defeat and going home but were getting out of Buffalo so we flew to to JFK and got another hotel for the night. Long story.

Sunday I arranged a `first Class ticket for Celia on Air India as our only option to get to he UK. I rode economy. `Celia slept most of the way and was fine upon arrival.

Mon we arrived Heathrow at 8:30 AM at went to the Hotel for a snooze. We stayed here overnight.

Tuesday we got a car and Celia drove us to Swanage where we will be staying until next Tuesday.

We are hoping everything will get much better Froom here on. Needless to say we were disappointed more than I can express here. Between the disappointment, personal baggage handling, lousy hotels, junk food meals on the run, it has been a trip from HELL so far. Celia is resting right now after a visit to Decia's. She may add to this later.

Cheers, Doug

Nearly Friday!

What a week .... blur of getting packed and organized and then heading down to Buffalo. It was one of those weeks that I can't even face thinking about and I am just glad it's over .

Dr O'Conner is concerned about mums nausea and scheduled some tests for when she returns from her trip. A brain MRI and a G.I study of her stomach . The brain MRI does sound a little worrisome,but good medicine rules OUT anything nasty . At this point, there is no cause for concern.

We saw Colin briefly at Ridley on the way down to Buffalo . He looks happy and relaxed. He has moved into a bigger dorm with the same room mates ..so he's quite pleased with himself !

I'm looking forward from a break ,no more doctors appointments for five long weeks ....mum of course can hardly believe that she is actually on her way .

Clothes

I know I said that I thought it would take much longer for mum to be up and around....I'm very pleased to report that I was wrong and true to form, mum surprised me by wanting to go shopping this evening. Her X-Ray was clear and so she headed off to the mall to pick out a nice outfit for her cruise . She is ultra precise about the kind of clothes she is looking for and being a canny Scot keeps her eye out for a bargain. Mum is certainly not the sort of person to meekly follow daughter about the mall.I picked out a sensible black suit but mum insisted that it was "old fashioned" . I chose a smart jacket but I was told it was drab ! Finally she settled on a gorgeous turquoise jacket and fitted navy pants. She looked terrific and it was hard to believe that she has been so down in the past few days .
She is also heading off to the hairdressers tomorrow for a makeover and is planning one last trip to the spa in Buffalo before she leaves . She's determined to look her best !
Mum certainly makes up for lost time and if there is one passenger on that cruise ship that will dazzle everyone it will be her !

More Of The Same

Immune system The system in the body that works to ward off infection and disease. Central to this system are the white blood cells. Some white blood cells produce antibodies in response to specific antigens that may invade the body; others function as scavengers to fight infection by destroying bacteria and removing dead cells.

This week has been rough . Mum is still very weak but she seems slightly better today . I think (hope)she's brighter and less fatigued. Tomorrow she will go for a chest X ray just to be on the safe side. She was seen by a really great Oakville doctor who does house calls. What a difference....no hanging around in waiting rooms . He's a nice guy too ...not that it's a prerequisite, but that personal connection helps .

I'm feel upset for mum...she's missed out a lot this week...she has'nt got anything ready for her trip, missed going out for a couple of dinners,did'nt have her bridge game. These are the things that give her some semblance of normality and control .

The difference between the two of us is quite obvious. I have also had bronchitis treated with antibiotics but I know that I will be up and around tomorrow. It's a much slower process for mum , her antibodies need a major boost as opposed to a gentle shove in the right direction.

Cough Cough.....

Mum and I both have bronchitis . Obviously, it's a lot more serious for mum as her immune system has really taken a beating recently. She has a heavy dose of antibiotics and an inhaler that is supposed to be particularly effective. Hopefully that will do the job and she can get better as quickly as possible.
She's sleeping a lot, drinking ginger ale and trying to eat small bites of food. It's all she can do right now until she gets her strength back. At least she's not nauseated anymore.

Achoo !!!

This weekend was hot and sunny with record breaking high temperatures, very unusual for thanksgiving weekend. Unfortunately for mum, she has been unable to enjoy this extra summer weather. On Sunday night it was clear that she was not doing well . Ongoing issues with nausea and also the start of a cold really knocked her out. She also had a strange looking rash all over her body. I called Roswell Park and the doctor on call suggested that I take mum down to the emergency at the local hospital. He felt that the best medication for nausea was Zofran and she should probably be rehydrated with fluids and get a high dose of the medication through the i.v. Fortunately Oakville Trafalgar Hospital was relatively quiet and mum was seen almost immediately . The doctor checked her over and suggested that she should take the medication three times a day and double her current dose. The X-ray of her stomach and blood work was thankfully normal and after a long night at the hospital she got tucked up into bed.

Unfortunately we are both now laid up with a horrible cold ....I haven't moved out of my bed for a day now and mum is the same . She's just trying to sleep it off .

YUCK ....this is awful ....I will check up on mum today and I hope she has turned the corner.

Thanksgiving Weekend

The dude with the shades is Colin ready for his long weekend at home . The weather is gorgeous - 27C today and bodes well for a wonderful thanksgiving weekend. The only issue is mum's continuing nausea and she is SICK of it ! As soon as the weekend is over, we will probably give the hospital a call and see if they have any other suggestions . She's got three types of medications, but nothing seems to work. If tomorrow is another bad day , I will probably to run down to Buffalo and pick up a prescription of Zofran for her . She was a bit reluctant before to take the pills because they are so expensive. At this point ...that can't be an issue. It needs to be resolved ....and fast.

Happy Birthday Lexi and Jen !

Wow... We can't believe it . Alexandra and Jennafer are 13 years old ! Mum and I are so proud of them ...they are turning into beautiful young women .

A Morning Visit

This morning I heard from mum on the phone sounding bright and breezy. She subsequently arrived at my door looking great and so I had to take a picture of her ....she goes down hard but then rebounds incredibly well !

She's got lots to do today ,errands, sorting things out and is keeping herself busy. Mum always says that she knows literally from the moment she opens her eyes in the morning how she is going to feel for the rest of the day . Today , I can just see from looking at her how she is doing ...taking on the world I suspect!

Tired couple of days

I popped by this evening to see mum. As she opened the door to her condo I could see that she does look ghastly ....tired and pale looking . Turns out she has unintentionally been overdosing herself with anti nausea medication. She has two types of pills and one in particular makes her very zonked. I think that she probably did not take enough of one medication and then doubled up the dosage on another. Mum of course is fed up with the whole lot and at this point would like to flush them all down the toilet !

I made her and Doug a simple omlette for dinner. She ate it all along with some toast and started looking more lively when I left . It's been a bad couple of days for mum and I hate to see her looking tired , especially when she has done so well recently.

One good thing though...her new condo looks wonderful. I will try to post some pictures of it. She is very happy in her new digs. She just needs to be able to enjoy it .....

It should have been a good day.....

This morning mum and Doug left Doug's condo for a day out on a bus tour. Unfortunately mum ended up feeling totally nauseous and sick ......but she was a real trooper and carried on with the trip despite a three hour bus ride home . When I called tonight she was tucked up in bed. We HAVE to get this nausea under control before mum goes on the cruise .

I'm concerned now ....the medications only have limited effect . We will need to sit down with Dr O'Conner and discuss this before she goes away .The nausea affects mum's day-to day life. It's great that so far things appear to be stable but it's awful if she can't get on with life because she has these horrible waves of sickness .

Tonight , I need to focus on balancing my own emotional equilibrium. I am worried about mum ...and feel churned up and anxious . The thought of her on the Atlantic ocean on a ship is bothering me and truthfully, mum being away for a month is also on my mind.

I find in general that the best way to combat anxiety is to make a plan and take action . The problem is that the nausea is not so easy to deal with ....and there's no "plan" that we can make with respect to mums illness. We are not just paying lip-service now to the notion of taking life day by day....it is a reality.